同章对照

“So, let me get this straight,” Wyvern asked, floating above the street outside Ryan’s hotel bedroom. “You came to New Rome hunting for the Meta-Gang, who managed to uncover a cache of Mechron tech beneath Rust Town. You also strongly believe that someone in Dynamis, probably Hector—namely, my employer—hired them to harass the Augusti.”

“Pretty much, yes.” Ryan nodded, wearing nothing but his underwear.

Wyvern smiled. “Am I being pranked?”

Was it because Ryan refused to wear a shirt? He had been replicating the plans for Vulcan’s armor when the superhero knocked on his window to make her sales pitch. “I would like to joke about it, but no, I’m serious.” The courier raised a thumb up. “Honest.”

Wyvern crossed her arms, a frown on her face. “Do you have any proof? These are dangerous allegations.”

“You can ask Ghoul,” Ryan said, pointing at a cooler next to his bed. “He makes the best ice cream.”

The superheroine’s frown only deepened. “But you didn’t let the Private Security bring him in custody.”

“I won’t surrender my favorite cooler,” Ryan replied. “Or else your incorruptible mooks will let him escape.”

“This meeting is going as well as I thought it would,” Wyvern lamented. “Let’s assume for a second that this isn’t some conspiracy theory and that I believe you. Why are you telling me this?”

“Because somebody trusted you.”

“Somebody?” Wyvern put her hands on her waist. “Quicksave, it will be difficult for us to build a degree of trust if you play your cards close to the chest. All in all, I find your tale rather… flimsy.”

“Well, she said you were naive too,” Ryan said and shrugged.

“I will not set aside what you said, but I only have your word on it. While you have a reputation for reliability, your psych evaluation implies you are highly unstable and prone to attention-seeking behavior.”

“Duh, you can’t make life a comedy without an audience. If you’re alone, it’s just a tragedy.”

Wyvern sighed, before offering Ryan the Dynamis business card anyway. “While I’m not sure you will follow through after what you just said, I suggest you meet with my manager. See if you are a good match, clear this up.”

“I hope he won’t mind if I bring a bottle of weedkiller?”

Wyvern couldn’t help but chuckle in response. “I wouldn’t try if I were you. Enrique isn’t fond of aggressive negotiations.”

And with those unwise words, Dragon Mom flew away and left the courier alone.

She didn’t believe Ryan, but at least the superheroine gave him the benefit of the doubt. It didn’t surprise the courier all that much. Wyvern didn’t know him well yet, and had been doubtful even with Mosquito’s testimony in an earlier loop.

And at long last, Vulcan called immediately afterward.

Ryan briefly hesitated to take the call, worried about how it would go. He eventually braced himself for the impact and answered. “Quicksave Deliveries?”

“What did the bitch tell you?” Vulcan’s encrypted voice asked.

The mere sentence sent a chill down the courier’s spine.

He had heard it before.

“My name is Vulcan,” the caller continued. “I represent the Augusti. We are the organization that runs things in New Rome, and most of Italy. Whatever the winged lizard promised you, we can offer more. We need people who get things done.”

Ryan listened to his former girlfriend the way one did a recording. “I’m sorry, mystery voice,” he interrupted her sales pitch. “But have we met before?”

Vulcan didn’t answer immediately. Perhaps he had called her out on a bluff. Perhaps she was toying with him, only to reveal that the armor had worked. That for once, things would be different.

Her next words hit him like a hammer.

“I think I would remember if we did.”

And like that, the last ember of Ryan’s hope died out.

“Anyway, if you’re interested, I sent you the Bakuto’s coordinates,” Vulcan said, Ryan not even bothering to check the email notification. “We own the establishment. Come tonight, alone, and don’t make us wait. We never ask twice.”

Yet, she just did.

More than twice.

---

Door-to-door salesmanship was difficult. You traveled for miles to pitch the perfect product to rednecks, only to be threatened with bodily harm.

A hand on a blue cooler, Ryan faced his meanest customer yet.

“What did you just say?” Shroud asked his visitor, a glass shard aimed at Ryan’s throat while his shack’s computer servers hummed in the background. It was so cute, how he thought the courier actually cared.

“That for one Ghoul Cooler bought, you get one free, Mechron-made orbital laser!” Ryan opened the box, with Ghoul’s skull glaring at him from within. “Made by Third World children paid five cents per hour and sold at the mere price of ninety bucks, this cooler is perfect for all and any improvised pick—”

“Cut the chit-chat,” Mr. See Through all but ordered.

“Matt, Matty, my friend, the sales won’t last forever,” Ryan mocked him. “You’re wasting a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity.”

The shard pushed against Ryan’s throat, threatening to draw blood. “You think knowing my name gives you power?” Shroud threatened. “I was ready to risk discovery when I came to New Rome, and I fear nothing. So last warning: spill the beans.”

“Cannibal Adam is trying to access the control panel of a Mechron-made orbital satellite, called the Baha…” Ryan tried to look for the exact name. “The Bahamut!”

The shack’s windows all fractured when he said the word.

Shroud remained silent for a while, before removing the shard aimed at his guest’s throat. He sank on his chair in front of the shack’s computers, hands clenched. “Okay,” the vigilante finally said, at a loss of words. “Okay, how did you know that name?”

“Well, as you guessed, I can see into parallel timelines, and select the one which favors me the most,” Ryan lied. While he had grown to know the glass manipulator through the various loops, he was still wary of confiding in him so early in their relationship. “I’ve seen some ugly ones.”

“One where Adam the Ogre gets his hands on the Bahamut.” The mere thought made the vigilante flinch in dread.

Wow. Ryan had never seen him startled that much before. That could only mean one thing. “You believe me?”

“Nobody but the people involved in the Mechron raid knew about the satellite,” Shroud declared. “It’s possible there was a leak from someone like Nidhogg, but you haven’t been in contact with any of the survivors as far as I know. Also, if you wished to deceive me, you would have found something less outlandish.”

“Hey, are you implying I’m not naturally outlandish?” Ryan asked with mock outrage. “I’m shocked, I tell you, shocked!”

“No, you aren’t,” Shroud replied, his fingers fidgeting. The news really had him worried. “Why are you telling me this?”

“So you can tell your Living Sun to hurry up because I can’t destroy the bunker alone.” At least not yet. “What is taking him so long anyway?”

Shroud let out a sigh. “Regularly fighting threats of Augustus’ caliber means our team has a lot of turnovers. After our last outing, the Carnival doesn’t have the numbers to take on the Augusti. We have heavy hitters, but so do our enemies.”

Ah, that explained their tactics. Why rely on asymmetrical warfare to weed out the enemy if you were in a position of strength? “So, your leader is recruiting?”

“He’s calling in favors from old allies, but they can’t leave their own protectorates for long,” Shroud admitted. “Leo didn’t feel confident he could have everyone on board before the end of May.”

“Yeah, well, Hannifat Lecter is probably less than two weeks away from success too,” Ryan added, like the cherry on the cake. The Meta-Gang destroyed New Rome on May 18th, though the courier doubted it would happen on the same date again. “Tell your sun to rise faster.”

“I will scout Rust Town and interrogate Ghoul. If I confirm your intel…” Shroud joined his hands, his fingers intertwined. “If you are correct, then we can’t afford to wait, no.”

“How long?”

“A few days at most.” Oh? Well, that went a lot better than expected. Ryan thought he would have to argue for hours, but the threat was dangerous enough for the Carnival to finally throw caution to the wind. “If it’s confirmed, I will contact you.”

“Well, then, I will infiltrate the Augusti and deliver on my end of the bargain,” Ryan said while moving towards the door, leaving the boxed Ghoul behind. “You still owe me ninety bucks for the cooler.”

“No,” the vigilante replied, trying to shortchange the courier.

“Matty, I don’t do charity.”

“No, as in, the Augusti will wait,” Mr. See Through declared firmly, much to Ryan’s surprise. “If you are correct and Dynamis hired the Meta-Gang, then this may only be the tip of the iceberg. Wyvern offered you a chance to join Il Migliore. Take it and keep me informed.”

Ryan put both hands on his waist. “What about your planned hits on the Augusti? Because I won’t oblige unless I have your word that you won’t target a few.”

“We don’t have resources to wage war on both the Augusti and Dynamis, if it turns out they’re the Meta-Gang’s employers,” Shroud declared, although it clearly wounded him to admit it. “Augustus is a monster and his business kills thousands each year, but he will sit on his mountain unless challenged. That bunker is an urgent crisis.”

“So, you will stop your serial apartment bombing spree until we’ve downsized Dynamis?”

“How do you know about that?” Mr. See Through shook his head. “Whatever. You have my word. At least, until Mechron’s legacy is put to rest once and for all.”

Well, time for a Dynamis run then.

It was better this way. Ryan wasn’t sure he could stand an Augusti run so soon after losing Jasmine.

Sometimes, he wondered why he kept clinging to false hopes when clearly the odds didn’t favor him. Time and time again, the courier had thought he could confide in someone, and not have it all wiped away with his inevitable death. Yet he kept reopening old wounds, instead of just… letting it go.

“I guess hope is a scoundrel’s last refuge,” Ryan muttered to himself, exiting Shroud’s shack with a heavy heart. Hope was all he had, once the loop had stripped him away of everything.

Ryan moved to his Plymouth Fury, only to find someone had beaten him to it.

A white, Persian cat slouched on the car hood, his magnificent blue eyes dazzling Ryan with the splendor of their nobility. The creature meowed ferociously at the courier, who immediately recognized him.

“Eugène-Henry?” Ryan approached the Plymouth Fury, examining the cat carefully. It… yes, it was Eugène-Henry. The courier could recognize the noble animal’s lazy, prideful attitude anywhere.

How could it be? The cat should be in the orphanage at this moment, and he never showed up at the old harbor in any previous loop. What was happening?

Eugène-Henry let out a loud ‘meow’ sound, demanding to be petted. So Ryan obliged, raising his hand to scratch the animal between the ears.

Pop.

Ryan’s hand touched only air.

There was no flash, no warning. One second, the cat was right in front of him; the next he had vanished.

Was he hallucinating? Or…

Wait, Eugène-Henry had been exposed to Violet dimension energies at the end of the previous loop; even perhaps that strange, alien entity the courier had briefly glimpsed. Could they have changed him somehow? Ryan knew cats were superior creatures, especially compared to dogs, but could these furballs truly gain superpowers like a Genome?

He had to go to the orphanage and check on the cat, just to be sure. Ryan sat on the driving seat, and prepared to make a short trip to Rust Town before meeting with his favorite cashmere supplier.

“Riri.”

At least, that’s what he planned for until her voice came out of the Chronoradio.

And this time, it wasn’t pre-recorded.

Ryan’s fingers clenched around the driving wheel, and he moved the car away, to get out of Shroud’s range. He had no intention of letting the vigilante eavesdrop on private matters. “Shortie.”

For an agonizing minute, Len didn’t seem to know what to say while Ryan drove through New Rome’s crowded streets. Finally, she mustered her courage. “I heard the broadcast. Through your chronoradio.”

… she did?

Of course she did, she had been listening to his communications since he arrived in New Rome.

All these years, he had hoped for someone that could remember him. And now...

“Is it true?” she asked. “Can you… time-travel?”

“Yeah,” the courier said bluntly, tensing up. He should have felt relieved, even happy by that unforeseen development, but the barrier between them had risen up again. The loop had washed away all their progress. “It happened before. I don’t know how the recording went through time though.”

Maybe Len had managed to complete her invention before the Bahamut wiped Ischia Island off the map, or it was a side-effect of Ryan’s own experiment.

Len considered the news, before asking another question. “Why didn’t… why didn’t you repeat it?”

“Repeat that conversation, you mean?”

“You… you and I…” He could almost picture her biting her lower lip on the other end of the line. “It worked before. It could have worked again.”

“I told you before,” Ryan said with a sigh, though that didn’t make much sense from her point of view. “The… the breakdown that led to this conversation had been genuine. If I repeated it, it would have been fake. Even if it worked, if it was necessary for us to become friends again, it would have been manipulation.”

Though it killed him inside, he couldn’t replace the Jasmine he lost either. Ryan may see it as mere amnesia, his old girlfriend had a point. If you forgot actions you didn’t commit yet and chose to go on another path, were you truly the same person? Or would you become someone else?

“I guess I wanted our relationship to remain true,” Ryan admitted, speaking with the heart. “Even if it hurts.”

He knew it was a lot to ask for, but that was what the courier wanted above everything else. He didn’t want to save the world or anything like this, though he would. Ultimately, all that Ryan desired, was to be happy.

“Where are you going, Riri?” Len asked, her voice breaking. She tried to keep her composure, but his words had clearly affected her.

“To the orphanage,” he said. “I have to check up on something. And make sure the kids will be alright.”

Psyshock was alive again, and if Ryan committed to Dynamis this loop, he couldn’t rely on Cancel to kill the bastard permanently. He had to figure a way out of this conundrum.

“I…”

Another short silence.

“I will be there too.”

“所以，让我理清楚，”双足飞龙悬在瑞恩酒店客房外的街道上空，问道，“你来新罗马是为了追查超能帮，他们在锈镇底下找到了一批梅克隆的科技装备。你还坚信，迪纳米斯有人，很可能就是埃克托——也就是我的雇主——雇他们去骚扰奥古斯蒂。”

“差不多，就是这样。”瑞恩点了点头，身上只穿着一条内裤。

双足飞龙笑了。“这是在整我吗？”

是因为瑞恩不肯穿上衣？这位超级英雄敲窗来向他推销时，他正在凭记忆重画伏尔甘铠甲的设计图。“我也想拿这事开玩笑，可惜不行。我是认真的。”信使竖起大拇指。“绝不骗人。”

双足飞龙抱起双臂，皱着眉。“你有证据吗？这些指控很危险。”

“你可以问食尸鬼。”瑞恩指了指床边的保冷箱。“他做的冰激凌是一绝。”

这位女超级英雄的眉头皱得更紧了。“可你没让私人安保队把他带走关押。”

“我可不会交出我最喜欢的保冷箱。”瑞恩答道，“不然，你手下那群清正廉洁的小喽啰就会放他逃跑。”

“这次会面果然跟我预想的一样顺利。”双足飞龙叹道，“暂且假设这不是什么阴谋论，我也相信你。你为什么要告诉我这些？”

“因为有个人信任你。”

“有个人？”双足飞龙双手叉腰。“快存，你要是什么都藏着掖着，我们很难建立起信任。总的来说，我觉得你这套说辞相当……站不住脚。”

“嗯，她也说过你很天真。”瑞恩耸了耸肩。

“我不会把你的话当耳旁风，但眼下我只有你的一面之词。虽然你向来以办事可靠著称，但你的心理评估显示，你的精神状态极不稳定，而且有博取关注的行为倾向。”

“废话，没有观众，哪能把人生过成喜剧。要是只有你一个人，那就只剩悲剧了。”

双足飞龙叹了口气，还是把迪纳米斯的名片递给了瑞恩。“听你刚才那番话，我不确定你还会不会来，不过我建议你跟我的主管见一面。看看你们合不合得来，把这件事说清楚。”

“我带瓶除草剂过去，他应该不会介意吧？”

双足飞龙忍不住轻笑了一声。“换作我就不会尝试。恩里克不喜欢咄咄逼人的谈判方式。”

留下这句不怎么明智的话，龙妈便飞走了，把信使独自留在原地。

她不相信瑞恩，但至少还愿意暂且听听，没急着否定。这并没有让信使多意外。双足飞龙还不够了解他，而且在之前的一轮里，即使有蚊子的证词，她也仍然心存疑虑。

紧接着，伏尔甘的电话终于打了过来。

瑞恩迟疑了片刻，不知接起电话会听到什么。他最终还是做好了迎接冲击的准备，按下接听。“快存速递？”

“那婊子跟你说了什么？”电话里传来伏尔甘经过加密处理的声音。

光是这一句话，就让信使脊背发凉。

他以前听过。

“我叫伏尔甘，”来电者继续说道，“我代表奥古斯蒂。新罗马，还有意大利大部分地区，都由我们说了算。不管那只长翅膀的蜥蜴许了你什么，我们都能给得更多。我们需要能把事情办成的人。”

瑞恩听着前女友的话，如同在听一段录音。“不好意思，神秘的声音，”他打断了她的招揽，“不过，我们以前见过吗？”

伏尔甘没有立刻回答。也许他拆穿了她的伪装。也许她只是在逗他，接下来就会告诉他，那套铠甲成功了。这一次，事情终于会不一样。

她接下来的话却像重锤一样砸中了他。

“要是见过，我想我会记得。”

就这样，瑞恩最后一点希望的余烬也熄灭了。

“总之，你要是有兴趣，我已经把博徒的坐标发给你了。”伏尔甘说道，瑞恩连邮件通知都懒得看一眼。“那家店是我们的。今晚过来，一个人，别让我们等。我们从不邀请第二次。”

可她刚刚就邀请了第二次。

还不止第二次。

---

上门推销真不容易。你跑了老远的路，向乡巴佬推销一款完美产品，换来的却是暴力威胁。

瑞恩一只手搭着蓝色保冷箱，面对着他迄今为止最凶恶的顾客。

“你刚才说什么？”裹尸布问这位访客，一片玻璃对准瑞恩的喉咙，棚屋里的电脑服务器在他身后嗡嗡作响。他居然以为信使会把这点威胁当回事，真可爱。

“买一个食尸鬼保冷箱，免费赠送一门梅克隆制造的轨道激光炮！”瑞恩打开箱子，里面食尸鬼的骷髅头正瞪着他。“由第三世界的童工制造，每小时工资五分钱，售价仅需九十块。这款保冷箱是任何一次说走就走的野——”

“少废话。”透明先生几乎是在下命令。

“马特，马蒂，我的朋友，促销可不是永远有效的。”瑞恩揶揄道，“你正在浪费一生只有一次的机会。”

玻璃碎片抵住了瑞恩的喉咙，随时可能划出血来。“你以为知道我的名字，就有筹码了？”裹尸布威胁道，“来新罗马的时候，我就做好了暴露的准备，我什么都不怕。所以最后警告你一次：把话说清楚。”

“食人狂亚当正试图取得一颗梅克隆制造的轨道卫星的控制权，那颗卫星叫巴哈……”瑞恩努力回想它的确切名字。“巴哈姆特！”

他说出那个词的瞬间，棚屋里所有的窗户都裂开了。

裹尸布沉默了一会儿，才撤开对准客人喉咙的玻璃碎片。他双手紧握，沉沉坐进棚屋电脑前的椅子里。“好吧。”义警终于开口，一时不知该说什么。“好吧，你怎么会知道这个名字？”

“嗯，正如你猜的，我能看见平行时间线，并从中选择对我最有利的那条。”瑞恩撒了个谎。虽然在多个循环中，他已经逐渐了解了这位玻璃操纵者，但在关系还这么生疏的时候，他仍然不敢轻易吐露秘密。“有些时间线很难看。”

“其中一条里，食人魔亚当拿到了巴哈姆特。”光是这个念头，就让义警恐惧地瑟缩了一下。

哇。瑞恩从没见他这么惊慌过。这只能说明一件事。“你相信我？”

“除了参与突袭梅克隆的人，没人知道那颗卫星的事。”裹尸布说道，“尼德霍格之类的人也许泄露过消息，但据我所知，你没接触过任何一个幸存者。另外，如果你想骗我，就会找个没那么离谱的说法。”

“喂，你是在暗示，离谱不是我的天性吗？”瑞恩佯装愤慨，“我震惊了，告诉你，我震惊了！”

“不，你没有。”裹尸布答道，手指不安地动来动去。这个消息真的让他很担忧。“你为什么告诉我这些？”

“好让你通知你们那个活体太阳，动作快点，因为我一个人摧毁不了那座地堡。”至少现在还不行。“话说，他到底为什么拖这么久？”

裹尸布叹了口气。“经常跟奥古斯都这种级别的威胁交手，意味着我们的队伍人员更替很频繁。上次行动之后，嘉年华已经凑不够人手对付奥古斯蒂了。我们有强力战将，可敌人也有。”

啊，这就解释了他们的战术。要是占据优势，何必靠不对称作战来逐个铲除敌人？“所以，你们的首领在招人？”

“他正在找老盟友讨人情，但那些人没法离开各自的保护区太久。”裹尸布承认，“利奥没把握能在五月底以前把所有人都召集过来。”

“是啊，不过汉尼胖·莱克特距离成功，大概也不到两个星期了。”瑞恩又补上一句，算是给蛋糕点缀上最后一颗樱桃。超能帮在五月十八日摧毁了新罗马，不过信使怀疑这次未必还会是同一天。“叫你们的太阳早点升起来。”

“我会去侦察锈镇，审问食尸鬼。如果能证实你的情报……”裹尸布双手交握，十指扣在一起。“如果你说得对，那我们确实等不起了。”

“要多久？”

“最多几天。”哦？这可比预想的顺利多了。瑞恩原以为得争论好几个小时，但这个威胁足够危险，终于让嘉年华愿意抛开顾虑了。“如果得到证实，我会联系你。”

“那好，我去打入奥古斯蒂，履行我这边的约定。”瑞恩说着走向门口，把装着食尸鬼的箱子留在原地。“保冷箱的钱，你还欠我九十块。”

“不行。”义警答道，分明想赖信使的账。

“马蒂，我不做慈善。”

“不行，我是说奥古斯蒂的事先放一边。”透明先生坚定地说道，令瑞恩颇为意外。“如果你说得对，是迪纳米斯雇了超能帮，那这恐怕还只是冰山一角。双足飞龙给了你加入至优者的机会。接受邀请，随时向我通报情况。”

瑞恩双手叉腰。“那你针对奥古斯蒂策划的那些袭击呢？你得保证不动其中的几个人，否则我不会答应。”

“如果迪纳米斯确实是超能帮的雇主，我们没有足够的资源同时向他们和奥古斯蒂开战。”裹尸布说道，尽管承认这一点显然让他很难受。“奥古斯都是个怪物，他的生意每年害死数千人，但只要没人挑衅，他就会待在山上不动。那座地堡才是迫在眉睫的危机。”

“所以，在我们给迪纳米斯裁完员之前，你会暂停你那套公寓连环爆破？”

“你怎么知道那件事？”透明先生摇了摇头。“算了。我保证。至少在梅克隆的遗产被彻底解决之前，我不会动手。”

好吧，那这一轮就走迪纳米斯路线。

这样也好。刚失去贾丝敏没多久，瑞恩不确定自己能不能承受再走一次奥古斯蒂路线。

有时他也不明白，明明胜算如此渺茫，自己为什么还死抓着虚妄的希望不放。一次又一次，信使以为自己终于能向某个人敞开心扉，不必在那场不可避免的死亡之后，让一切都被抹去。然而他还是一遍遍揭开旧伤，而不是就此……放手。

“看来，希望就是无赖最后的避难所。”瑞恩低声自语，怀着沉重的心情走出裹尸布的棚屋。循环剥夺了他的一切之后，他也只剩下希望了。

瑞恩走向自己的普利茅斯“狂怒”，却发现已经有谁抢先一步到了。

一只白色波斯猫懒洋洋地趴在引擎盖上，那双华美的蓝眼睛闪耀着高贵的光芒，看得瑞恩目眩。它凶巴巴地朝信使叫了一声，信使立刻认出了它。

“欧仁-亨利？”瑞恩走近普利茅斯“狂怒”，仔细端详这只猫。这……没错，它确实是欧仁-亨利。这高贵的动物那副慵懒傲慢的姿态，信使在哪儿都认得出来。

怎么可能？猫现在应该在孤儿院，而且在之前的任何一轮里，它都没在老港口出现过。这是怎么回事？

欧仁-亨利响亮地“喵”了一声，要求抚摸。瑞恩便依了它，抬手去挠它两耳之间的地方。

啵。

瑞恩的手只摸到了空气。

没有闪光，没有预兆。前一秒，猫还在他面前；下一秒，它就消失了。

他产生幻觉了？还是说……

等等，上一轮结束时，欧仁-亨利曾接触过紫色维度的能量；甚至可能接触过信使惊鸿一瞥间看到的那个古怪异界存在。它们会不会以某种方式改变了这只猫？瑞恩知道猫是高等生物，尤其跟狗比起来更是如此，但这些毛球真的能像基因者一样获得超能力吗？

他得去孤儿院看看那只猫，确认一下。瑞恩坐进驾驶座，打算先去一趟锈镇，再跟他最喜欢的羊绒供应商见面。

“瑞瑞。”

至少，在她的声音从时空收音机里传出来之前，他是这么打算的。

而这一次，不是录音。

瑞恩握紧方向盘，开车离去，驶出裹尸布的能力范围。他可不打算让那位义警偷听私事。“小矮个。”

在瑞恩开车穿行于新罗马拥挤街道的那难熬的一分钟里，蕾恩似乎一直不知道该说什么。她终于鼓起勇气。“我听到了那段广播。通过你的时空收音机。”

……她听到了？

她当然听到了，自从他来到新罗马，她就一直在监听他的通信。

这么多年来，他一直盼着能有一个人记住他。而现在……

“是真的吗？”她问，“你能……穿越时间？”

“是啊。”信使直截了当地答道，浑身绷紧。面对这意料之外的进展，他本该如释重负，甚至感到高兴，可两人之间的隔阂又重新竖了起来。循环冲走了他们之间所有的进展。“那是以前发生的事。不过，我也不知道录音是怎么穿越时间的。”

也许蕾恩在巴哈姆特将伊斯基亚岛从地图上抹去之前，成功完成了她的发明；也许这是瑞恩自己那场实验的副作用。

蕾恩消化着这个消息，又问了一个问题。“你为什么没……为什么没再来一遍？”

“你是说，重复那次谈话？”

“你……你和我……”他几乎能想象出她在那一头咬住下唇的样子。“以前管用过。再来一次，也可能管用。”

“我以前跟你说过，”瑞恩叹了口气，尽管从她的角度来看，这话没什么道理，“那……那次促成谈话的情绪崩溃是真的。如果我再来一遍，那就是假的。即使管用，即使我们非得这样才能重新成为朋友，那也只是在操纵你。”

尽管心如刀绞，他也不能拿另一个贾丝敏去替代失去的那一个。瑞恩或许只把这当成失忆，但他曾经的女友说得有道理。如果你忘记了自己还没做过的事，又选择走上另一条路，你真的还是同一个人吗？还是会变成另一个人？

“我想，我只是希望我们之间的感情能保持真实。”瑞恩坦白道，每一句都是心里话。“哪怕会痛。”

他知道这个要求很奢侈，但对信使来说，没有什么比这更重要。他并不想拯救世界，也不想干什么诸如此类的事，尽管他还是会去做。说到底，瑞恩想要的，不过是幸福。

“你要去哪儿，瑞瑞？”蕾恩问，声音有些哽咽。她努力保持镇定，但他的话显然触动了她。

“去孤儿院。”他说，“我得去确认一件事。还得确保孩子们平安无事。”

心震又活过来了，而如果瑞恩这一轮决定加入迪纳米斯，就不能指望消除者去彻底杀死那个混蛋。他得想个办法解决这个难题。

“我……”

又是一阵短暂的沉默。

“我也会过去。”