同章对照

Once upon a time, Ryan and Jasmine had sat around a workshop and planned to make an armor capable of destroying Dynamis’ HQ.

That promise was now fulfilled.

“You have two hidden switchblades below the arms and laser turrets in the gauntlets,” Vulcan explained, as she helped Ryan put the power armor on. Darkling slithered in the background, waiting for the experiment to begin. “Since you intend to force your way inside the HQ, I added a nuclear-powered chest blaster.”

“The Chernobyl?” Ryan asked with enthusiasm, as his Genius sidekick reinforced the armor’s joints with a screwdriver.

“Yep. If the blast doesn’t kill them, cancer will,” Vulcan replied with a grin, as she grabbed the armor’s helmet. “What?”

He had heard it all before. “I want rocket launchers too.”

“No,” she said immediately.

“Aw, come on…”

“You sound like a child, and there isn’t enough space to fit more weapons. Also, the blast might throw you backwards if you aren’t anchored on the ground.”

“I’ll keep that in mind,” Ryan replied, already imagining ways of abusing that feature. “Vulcan?”

“Yes, that’s my name.”

“Why the rabbit ears?” Ryan asked, pointed an armored finger at the helmet.

Using a design improved across multiple loops, Vulcan’s power armor was a technological marvel. An exoskeleton of lightweight, flexible alloy, it espoused Ryan’s form like a second skin. Its bright purple color made it impossible to ignore, just as the courier liked it. Its servos enhanced the wearer’s strength, yet the armor remained light enough not to impair his mobility. A reinforced backpack contained a miniature version of the Chronoradio, artificial brain included, which should allow the courier to transfer a mind across time. Unfortunately, even while working with Alchemo, Shortie hadn’t found a way to bring more than one person yet.

However, the armor’s strangest part was undoubtedly the helmet. Two long antennae rose from it, which combined with the orange lenses, made the helmet look like a robotic rabbit’s head. Ryan knew he had something of a hare theme going on, but this was too much. Too much.

“The antennae streamline your connection to the dimension which your power draws Violet Flux from,” Vulcan said with a shrug, as she put the helmet on Ryan’s head. “The armor’s artificial brain will gather data to help you better understand your power.”

Ryan glanced at the room around them, the bunker’s miniature particle collider. A chilling frost filled this conical chamber, the walls covered in weblike, biomechanical strands. Silver fluid flowed through them, and they hummed like a living entity’s veins; only a single blast door allowed someone to enter this facility.

Mechron’s technology had transcended flesh and metal to become something greater than both.

This was the place where the bunker’s AI summoned Darkling once. Perhaps the Alchemist had one such room in Antarctica, and used it to bring the Elixirs to the realm of men. Ryan really needed to dedicate a loop to locate and check up on that snowy base.

He had the feeling he would find many answers there.

Data appeared on the helmet’s lens after the courier put it on, the scene reminding him of that fateful loop where he accessed the Purple World. However, his current armor was a cut above the prototype. It included technology from various Geniuses, and components impossible to reproduce without Mechron’s matter replicator.

Ryan would have to conquer the bunker again to make a new suit. Something easier to say than do.

“Now we have to find a name for it,” the courier said. Ryan was sorely tempted to rename himself Plushie Master, but that might infuriate their long-eared overlords. “The Rabbinator?”

“That name sucks.”

“White Rabbit?”

“It’s not white, and you’re terrible at names,” Vulcan said, putting her hands on her waist as she found a name of her own. “How about… the Saturn Armor?”

“I thought the Augusti had exclusivity over Roman gods’ names?”

“I am an Olympian, you moron, and I say Saturn. Maybe you could even kick Augustus’ ass with it. Wouldn’t that be great?”

“You know Jupiter defeated Saturn, right?” Then again, Ryan was all about repeating lost battles until he won them. “How about Chronos instead?”

“This armor is my baby, so I name it. I name it Saturn.” She gave him a tap on the back of his head. “So, you’ll try the particle accelerator, and afterward it’s raiding time?”

“Yeah.” Livia had returned to her father, partly to make sure he wouldn’t get involved, and mostly so she would record the brain maps in a safe place. Ryan couldn’t afford to put her on the frontlines, since he needed her alive to transfer her mind across time.

Len took care of the children, using bathyspheres to send them away before things turned very messy. Alchemo had made a copy of his daughter’s mind, though he didn’t tell her why, and currently struggled to do the same with Sarin. The Genius theorized her memories were encoded in her molecular structure rather than neurons, and so made a record of it; Ryan needed to figure out a specialized solution for Sarin’s unique biology.

“You want to come?” Ryan asked Vulcan, almost eager.

“You bet I will,” she said with a grin. “Even if the bitch left them, I’ve got a bone to pick with the corpos.”

“It is time…” Darkling’s eerie voice caused Vulcan’s head to snap in his direction. “Open… the gate…”

“Damn it, I’m never getting used to it,” the Genius said, examining the Black Elixir. “I would love to study you in-depth.”

“I have been… studied... far longer than you can imagine…” the shoggoth replied, a hint of frustration in its voice. If it remembered all of Ryan’s loops, then he probably spent years trapped in a bottle. Perhaps even decades. “I have waited… long enough.”

“Well, I’ll keep the data then,” Vulcan said with a shrug, before exiting the room through the blast door and leaving the shoggoth alone with the courier.

“Are you… ready?” the Black Elixir asked Ryan.

“Sure, but I don’t see why you need me in the room,” the courier said. “The portal worked fine without me when Mechron’s machines trapped you in our dimension.”

“I will need… your help… to stabilize...” The alien entity seemed to struggle to find the right words in the human language. “You are connected… to the Purple World… the crossroad of all space and time… even other worlds…”

Ryan looked at his armored hands. “All of space and time, huh?”

“Distance… past, and future… are illusions. All is connected.”

So cryptically helpful. Vulcan’s voice echoed in the particle accelerator. “Ready to break the laws of physics?” she asked.

“Let’s make them cry,” Ryan replied.

Vulcan started the particle accelerator, the silver fluid pulsating with electricity. The walls rotated around Ryan and Darkling, faster and faster, until they started to blur. Gravity became lighter, the courier’s feet slowly getting off the ground.

Colored lightning coursed through the silver fluid, and surged all across the room. Bolts bounced off Ryan’s armor, or hit Darkling’s viscous surface. The electricity changed coloration in a strange pattern, from red to orange, from yellow to green, from blue to violet.

Flux.

The lightning became blinding white for a brief instant, and then turned black as the darkest night. Instead of surging in all directions, the bolts concentrated on a single point at the center of the room, building up into a sphere. A dark spot no bigger than a thumb, a black hole in the very fabric of reality.

“Too small…” Darkling’s many eyes focusing on the sphere with hope and dread. “Open it…”

“How do I do that?” Ryan asked, having a hard time hearing the giant slime over the sound of thunder.

“You are the key… open the gate.”

Ryan glanced at the sphere, and in a moment of scientific curiosity, took it in his palms. His fingers trembled as he did so, an invisible force coursing through his flesh and bones.

When his armored hands touched the sphere, his whole body shuddered, the Elixir in his veins reacting to the eldritch power. His thumbs dug into the black hole, its surface shifting like water. Ryan felt an intense, primordial cold inside this miniature portal.

The courier activated his power, and time slowed down to a crawl. His armor kept providing data even as the universe turned purple and violet particles floated all around him. Black lightning coursed through the particle accelerator even in the frozen time, colliding with the Violet Flux particles.

The universe’s fabric tore itself apart under the strain of Ryan’s power, and his hold on the portal became firmer. The courier extended his arms, and the gate widened. The sphere slowly grew from a tennis ball’s size, to that of a soccer one.

Ryan noticed a figure appearing at the edge of his vision, Violet Flux taking the shape of a humanoid specter racing at him. Though the phantom seemed to run towards the courier, it advanced slowly, only a few centimeters per second. The closer it became, the sharper its features; the courier noticed a magician’s hat, the shape of a jacket.

This is me, Ryan realized. His other self in the Purple World, converging towards his timeline. Always trying to catch up to the present. The armor enhanced his power enough that he could observe how it worked in detail.

If the phantom caught up to Ryan, he would create a new save point.

“The moment is now…” Darkling said, its voice brimming with an all-too-human emotion: hope. “Do it… do it now.”

And with a final push, Ryan opened the gate to the Black World.

The portal transformed into a disk two meters in diameter, a rift in spacetime itself. Colored streams of light formed a halo at its edge, like a black hole’s event horizon; a gate to a world of infinite darkness.

Ryan gazed into this abyss for seconds that seemed to stretch on forever. The portal’s energies interfered with his power, preventing his other self from catching up. Time itself grew unstable, and it frightened the courier. The Black World existed beyond time itself, beyond reason.

And yet… it drew him in like a moth to a flame.

Ryan remembered how Geist and Bacchus both got a glimpse of higher dimensions, and yearned to contact them again; just as Mechron had grown obsessed with creating a portal towards his power's source, according to the bunker’s files. The courier never understood why, until now.

A divine power dwelt within each colored dimension, and beckoned humans to come closer.

“Follow me.”

Ryan glanced at Darkling, who impatiently slithered towards the portal. The time anomaly didn’t affect it in the slightest. “Where?”

“To the other side.” The sentient Elixir’s form shifted, its liquid floating in midair while leaving a pile of corroded human bones behind. “The Black Ultimate One will free your spirit... from this flesh-shaped shell. Your mind shall no longer be bound... by your gravity and molecules. I will show you places… places you can’t even imagine. You will become free... from causality’s torments.”

Ryan glanced at the purple phantom, getting closer by the second. “I will leave everyone behind if I do that.”

“But inside the Black World… nothing is forbidden. You could see her again.”

Jasmine?

A person who could have existed yet never did. An impossibility that defied all laws of time and space. A woman who could only exist in an impossible place.

“No,” Ryan told himself. He had hope for the first time in centuries, and he needed to save New Rome from annihilation. He had made too many promises he couldn’t break. “No, I can’t…”

Her voice came out of the portal.

“I was a hero once.”

Ryan’s head snapped back at the abyss, and the impenetrable darkness beyond it. It spoke with another voice, the echo of someone long gone.

“God put us on Earth for a reason,” a man beckoned from the other side. “One day, you will realize the boulder isn’t your enemy. It’s your friend.”

“Simon?” Ryan asked, remembering a fateful conversation centuries past...

No, it wasn’t Simon. It was just an echo stirred up by the Black World, a lure to draw him in.

And yet… and yet, this dimension existed beyond time and space. Could something other than an echo remain on the other side? A remnant of canceled iterations?

“All that you have erased…” Darkling whispered. “You can make it exist again… a paradox.”

“Can’t you bring me in for the ride too?” Felix’s voice. “When you turn back time, Ryan, I’ll forget that. I’ll be angry and bitter at her, all over again. Her death will mean nothing.”

Ryan could bring them all back, if he crossed the threshold. Maybe find a Len with whom things went right, or some of the countless men and women he left in his dust. People he had loved and hated, known and remembered. Friends and loved ones who only existed in his memories now.

The abyss tempted the courier so sweetly. Something on the other side called him, begged him to leave that painful reality behind for a better one. One where he wouldn’t suffer anymore, and where his curse could finally end.

But…

The courier’s eyes wandered to the phantom of his past, catching up to him. He thought of all the promises he made, all the people who trusted him. There were fewer than the billions he erased, but they were alive. He couldn’t abandon them, even for a chance at happiness.

Both the black and the purple pulled him in a different direction, and Ryan couldn’t decide.

So the abyss spoke again, sinking its claws into the courier’s mind.

“Even if I disappear… promise you won’t forget me.”

The courier followed Darkling into the Black World.

The warmth of Earth’s dimension vanished, replaced with an absolute, chilling cold. Yet it felt strangely comforting.

The Black World was darker than the darkest abyss, and yet Ryan could see things moving inside. Living equations that had gained a life of their own; an ouroboros devouring its own tail, never running out of mass; stillborn realities neither time nor depth held sway.

This eldritch realm had a pulsating heart, a great darkness of unfathomable size. A black hole that made the one at the center of the Milky Way look like a speck of dust. An entity whose mere attention could erase Ryan from existence, if it didn’t consciously hold back.

The Black Ultimate One.

It had sent the voices to communicate with Ryan, the way a human might attempt to mimic an ant’s language. The entity had heard the courier’s wish, and would grant it in its own way.

Darkling’s form changed, from that of a slime to… something else. Something that gave Ryan a headache when he looked at it. A sphere with triangular ends and recursive eyes, prismatic wings, and impossible geometries. An entity that couldn’t exist in Earth’s reality, and could now regain its true form.

This place changed Ryan too. His hands seemed to flicker in and out of existence, turning into eldritch darkness one moment, and back to normal the next.

The courier was a creature of physical laws, of molecules and organs. This place had no logic, no rules to constrain him. The Saturn armor maintained his form for now, a shell protecting his essence, but the blackness would consume it. Ryan would lose his physical form, forget the very concept of a shape and ascend into something more than human.

Something free.

“Don’t go, Ryan.”

The voice was the courier’s own.

Ryan looked behind him, the portal nothing more than a lone star surrounded by the dark void of space. A figure of violet light had stopped running, and instead waited on the other side like an abandoned child.

“I cannot follow beyond this gate,” the purple phantom pleaded with Ryan’s own voice. “If you close the door… we will part ways forever.”

“You are my Elixir,” Ryan realized, his voice echoing all around him. “My save point.”

“I am your other half. The power slumbering within you.” The phantom extended a hand at Ryan, but couldn’t cross the portal. “If you ascend, you will no longer be human. You will become a denizen of this black realm, and you won’t return.”

“I don’t want to come back.” Ryan marked a short pause, a layer of ice growing on his armor from the cold. Darkling awaited at his side, silent as a tombstone. “I have come back too many times already.”

“I know,” the phantom said, apologetic. “And I am sorry for it. When we bonded, I looked deep inside of you. I tried to understand what you wanted, to fulfill your greatest wish.”

“Then why did you give me this power? Why do you keep reviving me, even when I die of old age?”

“Because I thought this power would make you happy, Ryan. That is what all Elixirs want for their humans. To help. Even if sometimes, we are not very good at it. You are so different from us…”

“If you want me to be happy, then stop bringing me back again and again!” Ryan snarled, unloading centuries of bitter despair. “Just let me rest!”

The phantom marked a pause, its voice brimming with genuine sadness. “I cannot, Ryan. I cannot stop you from returning. I cannot undo the wish you made when we bonded, nor change its parameters.”

“Then you know why I must go.” Ryan’s breath turned to ice, the darkness draining him of his warmth. The Black Ultimate One beckoned him to close the portal, and leave Earth forever. “It just… it just hurts. Even now… even now, I will leave people behind. Even with that technology and all this help… I will snuff countless lives out.”

Even with his godlike power, Ryan couldn’t save everyone.

“Death… death does not exist in the Purple World, which is why it fascinates the rabbit. It is innocent like a child, as I was once.” The phantom kept its hand extended, still hopeful its partner would come back to it. Back to the pain of immortality. “Humans die, yet they move on, even without your power. You wanted to return to the past, to change the present. This was the wish you made.”

The portal seemed to waver, the connection weakening.

“But you can move on now,” the specter argued. “You can stop looking to the past, and towards the future. Make new memories, and happier moments. You can grow old, have children. Find peace.”

Ryan sighed. “I feel old already.”

“But you won’t grow old alone anymore,” the Elixir argued. “You have never been alone, Ryan. I have always been with you, though you could not hear me. Every time you stumbled, I helped lift you up. When you entered the Purple World, it is I who begged the Ultimate One to help you. Because I care for you.”

Care.

Others cared for him. Len had fought at his side countless times, even after all Ryan cost her. Livia placed her trust in him, just as he took a gamble on her. He had befriended Felix, Fortuna, Jamie, and so many others. Sarin and other madmen had placed their hopes in him, of all people.

If Ryan left Earth behind, he condemned it. He would leave it to the Plushie, to Bloodstream, and Augustus to ravage. He would abandon Len to suffer, Livia to remain with her father, Felix to face his doom, and New Rome to burn.

But if he returned...

“I will never see them again if I go back,” Ryan said with a heavy heart. “All the people I left behind. If I can recreate their essence in this place, perhaps I can bring them through the portal…”

“If you use the Black to bring the dead back, they will suffer. Like your friend, they will be paradoxes in a universe unsuited for them. An existence of pure agony.” The specter shook its head, the portal slowly shrinking. “Let the dead rest, Ryan. Your place is with the living.”

Ryan glanced at Darkling, and at the colossal black hole. None moved to restrain the courier, and no past echo tempted him further.

The decision was his own.

He…

...

He couldn’t stay.

His Elixir was right, he didn’t belong with the dead. His place was with Len, Livia, and all the people who placed their trust in him. Even if it hurt… even if it hurt, Ryan had to let the past go.

“I’m sorry, Darkling,” Ryan said, as he turned to the friendly shoggoth. “I can’t stay here.”

“I understand,” the entity replied, its voice bizarre and yet comprehensible.

“You’re not mad?”

“Black is paradox… freedom from all laws… the ability to say no to everything. Even to itself.” The eldritch horror marked a short pause. “When you are satisfied with what you achieved, and wish to end it all… I will wait for you here.”

“Thanks,” Ryan said, nodding at the creature. “Farewell, Darkling.”

“Goodbye… my friend.”

Ryan took a step, and although there was no ground to walk on, he crossed the distance with the portal in an instant. The Black World itself bent to his will, granting him his wish.

The courier crossed the gate before it closed, returning to the particle accelerator. “Welcome home,” his other self said.

The courier canceled his power before he and his other self could touch, before a new save point could form. Time resumed at once, and the portal collapsed into nothingness. The violet particles vanished, and the courier stood alone in the particle accelerator; the only witness of that strange contact with the beyond.

“Did it work?” Vulcan’s voice echoed in the room.

In response, Ryan activated his power and froze time. The world turned purple, and the violet specter appeared again at the edge of his vision.

“Can you speak?” the courier asked.

No answer. The specter kept moving in his doppelganger’s direction, but made no sound. Perhaps direct communication had only been possible due to the Black World’s interference. Ryan extended an armored hand at his double as if to reach for it, and immediately froze.

Black particles floated out of his body, alongside the violet ones.

从前，瑞恩和贾丝敏曾一起坐在工坊里，计划造一套能摧毁迪纳米斯总部的装甲。

如今，那个承诺兑现了。

“两条手臂下方各藏了一把弹簧刀，护手里装了激光炮塔。”伏尔甘一边解释，一边帮瑞恩穿上动力装甲。暗灵在后方缓缓蠕动，等着实验开始。“既然你打算硬闯总部，我又加了一门核动力胸炮。”

“切尔诺贝利？”瑞恩兴奋地问。他的天才搭档正用螺丝刀加固装甲的关节。

“对。轰不死他们，也能让他们死于癌症。”伏尔甘咧嘴一笑，拿起装甲的头盔。“怎么了？”

这些话，他全都听过。“我还想要火箭发射器。”

“不行。”她立刻回绝。

“哎，别这样嘛……”

“你听着就像个小孩，而且已经没地方再塞武器了。还有，开炮的时候，要是没把自己固定在地上，冲击可能会把你向后掀飞。”

“我会记住的。”瑞恩答道，脑子里已经开始琢磨怎么滥用这个特性了。“伏尔甘？”

“对，那是我的名字。”

“为什么要有兔耳朵？”瑞恩用包覆着装甲的手指指向头盔。

伏尔甘的动力装甲采用了历经多轮循环改进的设计，堪称科技奇迹。轻质柔性合金打造的外骨骼像第二层皮肤般贴合瑞恩的身形。鲜亮的紫色让人想不注意到它都难，正合这位快递员的心意。伺服装置增强了穿戴者的力量，整套装甲却依然轻便，不会妨碍他的行动。加固背包里装着一台微缩版时空收音机，连人工大脑也包含在内，应该能让快递员把一个人的意识传送到过去。遗憾的是，即使与阿尔凯莫联手，小矮个也还没找到一次带回多人的办法。

不过，装甲最古怪的部分无疑是头盔。两根长长的天线从顶部竖起，配上橙色镜片，简直就是一颗机器兔脑袋。瑞恩知道自己多少有点野兔主题的风格，可这也太过了。太过了。

“你的能力要从那个维度汲取紫色通量，天线能让你与它的连接更顺畅。”伏尔甘耸耸肩，把头盔戴到瑞恩头上。“装甲的人工大脑会收集数据，帮助你更好地理解自己的能力。”

瑞恩扫视四周。他们身处地堡的微型粒子对撞机内部。锥形舱室里寒气彻骨，墙壁上布满蛛网般的生物机械纤维。银色液体在其中流动，纤维嗡嗡作响，仿佛活物的血管；整座设施只有一扇防爆门可供出入。

梅克隆的技术已经超越血肉与金属，成为凌驾于两者之上的造物。

地堡的人工智能曾在这里召唤出暗灵。也许炼金术师在南极也有这样一间舱室，借此将灵药带到人间。瑞恩确实该专门花上一轮循环，找到那座冰雪中的基地，去看看究竟。

他有种感觉：在那里，他会找到许多答案。

快递员戴好头盔后，数据便浮现在镜片上。这一幕让他想起那场命运攸关的循环，那一次，他进入了紫色世界。不过，他如今这套装甲比原型机高出一个档次。它融合了多位天才的技术，有些零件若没有梅克隆的物质复制机，根本无法复刻。

要再造一套，瑞恩就得重新攻占这座地堡。这事说起来容易，做起来难。

“现在得给它起个名字。”快递员说。瑞恩很想把自己的名号改成“毛绒玩偶大师”，但那可能会惹怒他们那些长耳朵的至高统治者。“终结兔？”

“这名字烂透了。”

“白兔？”

“它又不是白的，而且你起名字的本事实在不怎么样。”伏尔甘双手叉腰，自己想了个名字。“叫……萨图恩装甲怎么样？”

“我还以为罗马诸神的名字被奥古斯蒂垄断了呢？”

“我就是奥林匹斯的一员，你个蠢货。我说就叫萨图恩。说不定穿上它，你连奥古斯都都能揍趴下。那不是很棒吗？”

“你知道朱庇特打败了萨图恩吧？”不过话说回来，瑞恩最擅长的就是把输掉的仗一遍遍重打，直到赢为止。“不如叫柯罗诺斯？”

“这套装甲是我的宝贝，名字我说了算。我给它起名叫萨图恩。”她在他后脑勺上拍了一下。“所以，你先试试粒子加速器，然后就该去突袭了？”

“对。”莉维娅已经回到父亲身边，一部分原因是要确保他不会插手，更主要的原因，则是她需要在安全的地方记录那些脑图谱。瑞恩不能让她上前线；要把她的意识传送到过去，就必须让她活着。

蕾恩在照料孩子们，趁局面彻底失控之前，用深潜球把他们送走。阿尔凯莫已经复制了女儿的意识，只是没告诉她为什么；此刻，他正绞尽脑汁，想在沙林身上做到同样的事。这位天才推测，她的记忆并非编码在神经元里，而是编码在分子结构中，于是把分子结构记录了下来。针对沙林独特的生理构造，瑞恩还得想出一个专门的解决方案。

“你想一起去吗？”瑞恩问伏尔甘，语气里几乎带着热切。

“那还用说。”她咧嘴一笑。“就算那个婊子已经离开了，我跟那帮公司走狗也还有账要算。”

“时候……到了……”暗灵诡异的声音让伏尔甘猛地转过头去。“打开……门……”

“妈的，我永远也习惯不了。”这位天才打量着黑色灵药。“真想好好研究一下你。”

“我被……研究的时间……远比你能想象的更长……”修格斯答道，语气里带着一丝烦躁。如果它记得瑞恩的所有循环，那它恐怕已经在瓶子里被困了好几年。甚至可能是几十年。“我已经……等得够久了。”

“行吧，那我留着数据就好。”伏尔甘耸耸肩，穿过防爆门离开舱室，只留下修格斯和快递员。

“你……准备好了吗？”黑色灵药问瑞恩。

“当然，不过我不明白，为什么非得让我待在这里。”快递员说。“当初梅克隆的机器把你困在我们这个维度时，没有我，传送门不也照样能用吗？”

“我需要……你帮忙……稳住它……”这异界生命似乎很难从人类语言中找到合适的词。“你连接着……紫色世界……所有时间与空间的交汇点……甚至包括其他世界……”

瑞恩看了看自己包覆着装甲的双手。“所有的时间与空间，是吗？”

“距离……过去，还有未来……都是幻象。万物皆相连。”

真是玄之又玄的好建议。伏尔甘的声音在粒子加速器里回响。“准备好打破物理定律了吗？”她问。

“把它们打哭吧。”瑞恩答道。

伏尔甘启动粒子加速器，银色液体随电流脉动。舱壁围绕瑞恩和暗灵旋转起来，越来越快，直到模糊成一片。重力渐渐减弱，快递员的双脚缓缓离开地面。

彩色闪电穿过银色液体，在整间舱室里奔涌。有的电弧从瑞恩的装甲上弹开，有的击中暗灵黏稠的体表。电光以一种奇异的规律变换颜色，从红到橙，从黄到绿，从蓝到紫。

通量。

闪电短暂地化作刺目的白色，随即变成深夜般的漆黑。电弧不再四处奔涌，而是集中到舱室正中央的一点，凝成一个球体。一个还没有拇指大的黑点，一个开在现实结构本身之中的黑洞。

“太小了……”暗灵的许多只眼睛一齐盯着球体，既希冀，又惶恐。“打开它……”

“怎么打开？”瑞恩问。雷鸣震耳，他几乎听不清这团巨型黏液的声音。

“你就是钥匙……打开门。”

瑞恩看向球体，出于一时的科学好奇心，将它捧在掌中。手指随之颤抖，一股无形的力量贯穿他的血肉与骨骼。

装甲覆盖的双手触及球体的瞬间，他全身一震，血管中的灵药对这股诡异的力量产生了反应。他的拇指探入黑洞，球体表面如水般荡漾。瑞恩从这道微型传送门里感受到一股强烈而原始的寒意。

快递员发动能力，时间慢得近乎停滞。宇宙变成紫色，紫色粒子漂浮在他四周，装甲仍在持续提供数据。即便在凝固的时间里，黑色闪电依旧在粒子加速器内奔流，与紫色通量粒子相撞。

在瑞恩能力的压力下，宇宙的结构被撕裂了，他对传送门的掌控也更加稳固。快递员向外伸展双臂，门随之扩大。球体缓缓从网球大小，膨胀到足球大小。

瑞恩注意到，视野边缘出现了一道人影。紫色通量凝成一个人形幽影，朝他奔来。那幻影看似在向快递员奔跑，前进得却很慢，每秒只有几厘米。它越靠近，轮廓就越清晰；快递员看见了一顶魔术师礼帽，还有一件夹克的形状。

那是我。瑞恩意识到了。那是紫色世界里的另一个自己，正向他所在的时间线汇聚。一直在努力追赶现在。装甲对他能力的增幅，已经足以让他仔细观察其运作方式。

如果幻影追上瑞恩，他就会建立一个新的存档点。

“就是现在……”暗灵的声音里满溢着一种再人性化不过的情绪：希望。“动手……现在就动手。”

瑞恩最后再用了一把力，打开了通往黑色世界的大门。

传送门变成一面直径两米的圆盘，一道直接撕开时空的裂隙。彩色光流在边缘形成一圈光晕，仿佛黑洞的事件视界；这是一扇通往无尽黑暗世界的大门。

瑞恩凝视这片深渊，短短几秒仿佛延展成了永恒。传送门的能量干扰了他的能力，让另一个自己无法追上他。连时间本身都变得不稳定起来，这令快递员心生恐惧。黑色世界存在于时间之外，也存在于理性之外。

然而……它吸引着他，如同火焰吸引飞蛾。

瑞恩想起幽魂和巴克斯都曾窥见高维世界，并渴望再次与其接触；地堡的档案也记载，梅克隆曾痴迷于建造一扇通往自身能力源头的传送门。快递员始终不明白为什么，直到现在。

每一个颜色维度之中，都栖居着一股神性的力量，召唤人类靠近。

“跟我来。”

瑞恩看向暗灵，它正迫不及待地蠕动着靠近传送门。时间异常对它毫无影响。“去哪儿？”

“去另一边。”有意识的灵药改变了形态，构成它的液体浮在半空，只留下一堆被腐蚀的人骨。“黑色终极者会让你的精神……摆脱这具血肉形状的外壳。你的意识将不再受……你们的重力与分子束缚。我会带你去一些地方……一些你根本无法想象的地方。你将得到自由……不再受因果的折磨。”

瑞恩看向那道紫色幻影，它正一秒秒靠近。“那样的话，我会把所有人都抛下。”

“可在黑色世界里……没有什么是不被允许的。你可以再见到她。”

贾丝敏？

一个本可能存在，却从未存在过的人。一个违背所有时空法则的不可能。一个唯有在不可能之地才能存在的女人。

“不。”瑞恩告诉自己。几百年来，他第一次有了希望，而且他还得拯救新罗马，让它免于毁灭。他许下过太多承诺，不能食言。“不，我不能……”

她的声音从传送门里传了出来。

“我也曾是个英雄。”

瑞恩猛地转头，望向深渊，望向那彼端无法看透的黑暗。它又用另一个声音开了口，那是早已逝去之人的回响。

“上帝让我们来到世上，自有他的用意。”一个男人在另一边呼唤。“总有一天，你会明白，巨石不是你的敌人。它是你的朋友。”

“西蒙？”瑞恩问，想起几百年前那场改变命运的交谈……

不，那不是西蒙。那只是黑色世界激起的一道回声，是引诱他进去的饵。

可是……可是，这个维度存在于时间与空间之外。彼端会不会留下了回声以外的东西？那些被抹除的循环的残余？

“你抹去的一切……”暗灵低语。“你可以让它们重新存在……一个悖论。”

“就不能把我也带上吗？”是菲利克斯的声音。“你让时间倒流以后，瑞恩，我会把这些忘掉。我会重新对她满怀愤怒和怨恨。她的死将毫无意义。”

只要跨过门槛，瑞恩就能把他们全带回来。也许能找到一个蕾恩，他和她之间的一切都顺遂如愿；也许能找到他一路抛在身后的无数男女中的一些。他爱过、恨过、认识过、记得的人。那些如今只存在于他记忆中的朋友与所爱之人。

深渊的诱惑如此甜美。彼端有什么东西在呼唤他，恳求他抛下痛苦的现实，走向更美好的那一个。在那里，他不必再受苦，他的诅咒终于可以结束。

可是……

快递员的目光移向那个从过去追赶而来的幻影。他想起自己许下的所有承诺，想起所有信任他的人。他们的数量比不上他抹去的那数十亿人，但他们还活着。他不能抛弃他们，哪怕那意味着一个获得幸福的机会。

黑色与紫色各自将他拉向不同的方向，瑞恩无法抉择。

于是深渊再次开口，将利爪扎进快递员的心中。

“就算我消失了……答应我，不要忘记我。”

快递员跟着暗灵，走进了黑色世界。

地球所在维度的温暖消失了，取而代之的是一种绝对的、彻骨的寒冷。奇怪的是，这寒冷却让人安心。

黑色世界比最深的黑暗深渊还要幽暗，瑞恩却能看见里面有东西在移动。获得了独立生命的活方程；不断吞食自己尾巴、质量却永不耗尽的衔尾蛇；胎死腹中的现实，时间与纵深在其中都无权主宰。

这片诡谲的领域有一颗搏动的心脏，一团大到无法估量的巨大黑暗。那是一个黑洞，相较之下，银河系中心的黑洞也不过是一粒尘埃。一个若不有意克制，仅仅投来注视，就能将瑞恩从存在中抹去的生命。

黑色终极者。

是它送来了那些声音，试图与瑞恩交流，正如人类可能会尝试模仿蚂蚁的语言。这个生命听见了快递员的心愿，并将以自己的方式为他实现。

暗灵的形态变了，从一团黏液变成了……别的东西。某种瑞恩看上一眼就会头痛的东西。一个末端呈三角形、长着递归之眼与棱镜般双翼、具有不可能几何结构的球体。一个无法在地球现实中存在，如今终于可以恢复真身的生命。

这个地方也在改变瑞恩。他的双手似乎在存在与不存在之间闪烁，前一刻化作诡异的黑暗，下一刻又恢复正常。

快递员是一个受物理法则支配、由分子和器官构成的生物。这里没有逻辑，也没有规则约束他。萨图恩装甲暂时维持着他的形态，如同一层保护其本质的外壳，但黑暗终将吞没它。瑞恩会失去肉体，连“形状”这个概念本身都忘掉，升华为超越人类的存在。

一个自由的存在。

“别走，瑞恩。”

那声音属于快递员自己。

瑞恩回头望去，传送门宛如一颗孤星，被黑暗虚空包围。那道紫光构成的人影已经不再奔跑，而是在另一边等待着，像一个被遗弃的孩子。

“我无法跟你越过这扇门。”紫色幻影用瑞恩自己的声音哀求。“如果你关上门……我们就会永远分开。”

“你是我的灵药。”瑞恩明白了，他的声音在四周回荡。“我的存档点。”

“我是你的另一半。沉睡在你体内的力量。”幻影向瑞恩伸出手，却无法穿过传送门。“如果你升华，就不再是人类了。你会成为这片黑色领域的居民，再也不会回来。”

“我不想再回去了。”瑞恩顿了顿，严寒让装甲表面结起一层冰。暗灵在他身旁等待，沉默得像一块墓碑。“我已经回去太多次了。”

“我知道。”幻影满怀歉意地说。“为此，我很抱歉。我们结合时，我看向了你的内心深处。我试着理解你想要什么，实现你最大的心愿。”

“那你为什么要给我这种能力？为什么不停地让我复活，哪怕我是老死的？”

“因为我以为，这种能力会让你幸福，瑞恩。所有灵药都希望自己的人类幸福。都想帮上忙。即使有时，我们做得并不好。你们与我们太不一样了……”

“如果你想让我幸福，那就别再一次又一次把我带回去！”瑞恩怒吼，把积压了几百年的苦涩与绝望全都倾泻出来。“就让我安息吧！”

幻影停顿片刻，声音里满是真切的悲伤。“我做不到，瑞恩。我无法阻止你返回。我无法撤销我们结合时你许下的心愿，也无法更改它的参数。”

“那你就知道，我为什么非走不可。”瑞恩呼出的气息凝成了冰，黑暗正一点点抽走他的温度。黑色终极者召唤着他，要他关上传送门，永远离开地球。“只是……只是太痛苦了。即使到了现在……即使现在，我还是会抛下别人。就算有那些技术，有这么多人帮忙……我还是会掐灭无数条生命。”

即使拥有神一般的力量，瑞恩也无法救下所有人。

“死亡……紫色世界里没有死亡，所以那只兔子才会如此着迷。它像孩子一样天真，正如曾经的我。”幻影始终伸着手，仍盼望自己的伙伴能回到它身边。回到永生的痛苦之中。“人类会死，可他们仍会继续前行，即使没有你的能力。你想回到过去，改变现在。这就是你许下的心愿。”

传送门似乎晃动起来，连接正在减弱。

“可现在，你可以向前走了。”幽影劝道。“你可以不再回望过去，转而看向未来。创造新的记忆，更多幸福的时刻。你可以慢慢变老，养育孩子。找到安宁。”

瑞恩叹了口气。“我已经觉得自己很老了。”

“可你再也不必独自老去了。”灵药说。“你从来都不是一个人，瑞恩。我一直与你同在，只是你听不见我。每次你跌倒，都是我帮你重新站起来。你进入紫色世界时，是我恳求终极者帮助你。因为我在乎你。”

在乎。

有人在乎他。蕾恩曾无数次与他并肩作战，即便瑞恩已经让她付出那么多代价。莉维娅选择了信任他，正如他也曾在她身上赌了一把。他与菲利克斯、福尔图娜、杰米，还有许许多多的人交上了朋友。沙林和其他疯子，偏偏把希望都寄托在了他身上。

如果瑞恩抛下地球，就等于判了它死刑。他会把它留给毛绒玩偶、血流和奥古斯都，任由他们蹂躏。他会抛下蕾恩，让她继续受苦；让莉维娅继续困在父亲身边；让菲利克斯走向末路；让新罗马化为火海。

可如果他回去……

“我一旦回去，就再也见不到他们了。”瑞恩心头沉重。“那些被我抛在身后的人。如果能在这里重现他们的本质，也许我就能带他们穿过传送门……”

“如果你借助黑色带回死者，他们会受苦。就像你的朋友一样，他们会成为悖论，身处一个不适合他们的宇宙。他们的存在将只剩折磨。”幽影摇了摇头，传送门正在缓缓缩小。“让逝者安息吧，瑞恩。你该留在活人身边。”

瑞恩看向暗灵，又看向那无比庞大的黑洞。没有谁出手阻拦快递员，也不再有过去的回声诱惑他。

决定权在他自己手里。

他……

……

他不能留下。

他的灵药说得对，他不属于死者的世界。他该待在蕾恩、莉维娅，以及所有信任他的人身边。即使痛苦……即使痛苦，瑞恩也必须放下过去。

“对不起，暗灵。”瑞恩转向这只友善的修格斯。“我不能留在这里。”

“我明白。”那生命答道，声音古怪，却能听懂。

“你不生气？”

“黑色就是悖论……是摆脱所有法则的自由……是对一切说不的能力。即使面对自身，也不例外。”这诡异的恐怖存在略作停顿。“等你对自己的成就感到满意，想要结束这一切时……我会在这里等你。”

“谢谢。”瑞恩向它点点头。“再会，暗灵。”

“再见……我的朋友。”

瑞恩迈出一步。虽然脚下没有地面，他却在瞬间跨过了自己与传送门之间的距离。黑色世界本身顺从了他的意志，实现了他的愿望。

快递员赶在门关闭之前穿了过去，回到粒子加速器中。“欢迎回家。”另一个自己说。

在与另一个自己接触之前，在新的存档点形成之前，快递员解除了能力。时间立刻恢复流动，传送门坍缩为虚无。紫色粒子消失了，粒子加速器里只剩快递员独自站着；他是这场与彼端奇异接触的唯一见证者。

“成功了吗？”伏尔甘的声音在舱室里回荡。

瑞恩的回应是发动能力，暂停时间。世界变成紫色，紫色幽影又出现在视野边缘。

“你能说话吗？”快递员问。

没有回答。幽影仍朝着与自己一模一样的人走来，却没有发出任何声音。也许只有受到黑色世界干扰时，他们才能直接交流。瑞恩向另一个自己伸出包覆着装甲的手，像是想触碰它，却立刻僵住了。

黑色粒子伴着紫色粒子，一同从他的身体里飘了出来。